Roseville Launches ‘Don’t Nevada County Roseville’ Campaign

Unidentified Nevada County Protestor and apparent White Sox fan in Roseville, CA.

Roseville, CA — Roseville native and local zoning activist Misty Smith doesn’t like what she’s seeing in her neighborhood. So she’s formed a controversial Roseville group to stop Nevada County from influencing anti-development forces in her town.

“Roseville used to be this safe, clean and orderly place to live,” Ms. Smith observed, “but now all these hippie types are starting to show up. These are loud–and frankly very rude–people coming down here from Nevada County, telling us how to live our lives.”

Misty Smith is Chairman for the 380+ member strong “Don’t Nevada County Roseville” Citizen’s Commission (DNCRCC), which is a collection of local, pro-growth developers and property owners.

“Our mission,” Ms. Smith informed Gish Gallop in an exclusive Skype interview, “is to prevent barefoot Nevada County activists from taking over our well-organized, corporate shopping experience here.”

According to the critically acclaimed and credible website Yelp, Roseville, CA is “unlike the hell hole of downtown and midtown Sacramento. In the municipality of Roseville, garbage gets picked up, streets are maintained, the abundant and spacious parks are clean and safe, and the town is well policed. The city council members do not stage fierce debates on foreign policy they have no control over, and instead focus on making local decisions that stick.”

“Nevada County is full of a bunch of  over-educated hippies and wacko gun-toters who think they know it all. We don’t need that disorder here in Roseville,” continued Ms. Smith.

When asked about their chances of keeping the Nevada County “hooligans,” as she referred to them, out of Roseville Ms. Smith replied, “I dunno. There’s not much we can do other than raise awareness. We’re working hard to keep our borders.”